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Valerie Berenyi 



Kim Sanderson 

art director 
Ken Wentz 

associate art director 
Ken Fedoruk 
editorial assistant 

Arly Campbell 
production director 
Clint Ackerman 
associate editors 
George Claxton 
Don Boynton 
Jack Ciulla 
Mike Heffring 
contributing editor 
Ken Low 


publishing advisors 
Jan Skirrow 
Bob Bryant 






ZOOT, The Magazine Is published by AADAC six 
times a year, and is part of AADAC's primary 
prevention program The editorial office is located 
at 2410, 144 - 4th Avenue S.W.. Calgary, Alberta 
T2P 3N4. Subscription rates: free of charge to all 
12 - 17-year-olds residing in Alberta; $9 00 per 
year to all other subscribers within Canada; 
$15.00 per year outside Canada; $1 .50 per single 
copy. Write to ZOOTwith payment for subscrip- 
tions. Copyright 1986 by AADAC All rights 
reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part 
without written permission is prohibited. ZOOT 
welcomes stories, art and photo contributions 
All contributions must be accompanied by a 
stamped self-addressed envelope. ZOOT is not 
responsible for unsolicited contributions 
Material should be addressed to: Editor, ZOOT, 
The Magazine, 2410, 144 - 4th Avenue S.W.. 
Calgary, Alberta T2P 3N4. 


ZOOT will be delivered free to your home if 
you're between 12 and 17 years old and live 
in Alberta. Just write to: Subscriptions, 2410, 
144- 4th Avenue S.W., Calgary, Alberta 
T2P 3N4, or call toll-free 1-800-372-9578 and 
give us your age. name, address. If you are 
getting ZOOT and you don't want to, let us 
know and we'll leave you ZOOTIess. 

elcome to 
1987 and to 
the third 
ssue of the 
new ZOOT. 
It's hard to 
believe that three 
issues have been put 
out and that it's only 
three years away to 
the year 1990: a good time to take stock of 
where we've been and where we're going. 

One of our key goals when we started ZOOT 
was to hear what you, the reader, want from the 
magazine: if it's relevant to your life, if it makes 
you think and whether or not you enjoy reading 
it. So, we put a survey form in the September 
issue and hoped some of you might write to us. 
Write you did! The response was overwhelm- 
ing and the ideas and suggestions you gave 
us were invaluable. Read about it on page 5 in 
ZOOT Scoops. Then, sit down and write us 
again after you've finished reading this issue. 
Let me know if there's anything we should add 
to ZOOT or improve upon. 

Which brings me to my next topic: improve- 
ments. Because it's the new year and all that, 
people usually start toting out the New Year 
resolutions: "I resolve to start running 10 miles 
every day" or "I resolve to lose 40 pounds in two 
months." These resolutions are good intentions, 
but it seems they only last a couple of weeks 
— maybe to the middle of February — and then 
old habits rear their ugly heads. 

The reason? People tend to set unrea- 
sonable goals and expect to change them- 
selves or learn a new thing overnight. Writer Ric 
Durrant has a good suggestion for this age-old 
problem. Read his story Watching Someone 
Useless on page 20. Ric talks about doing or 
learning a new thing by breaking it down into 
a series of manageable goals — by taking small 
steps toward a larger goal. 

I once made a resolution to never make 
resolutions, but here goes: my goal is to learn 
how to paint with watercolors. I don't ever expect 
to rival Renoir but I do hope to progress beyond 
my Grade 4 level of artistic ability! (I draw a 
l mean stick man.) And by the year 1990, 1 just 
may be ready to paint something fairly 
decent and not blush when someone other 
than my cat looks at it. 

Now that you know my resolution, 
what about yours? What would you like 
to accomplish by the year 1990? 
Valerie Berenyi 

0 N T E N T S 





Be a good beginner 


Look who's talking now 


^ m Suicide: It's not the answer 


























Cover Photo: Edward Gadjel 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 3 



The results are in! The response 
to our survey was overwhelming. 
Every week hundreds of survey 
forms poured into ourZOOTmailbox. 
The bottom line is that 95 percent of 
you like us a lot. 

But you're not without criticism. 
And it is constructive. Some of the 
most common suggestions were: 
"Give us more fun things to do like 
contests and quizzes," "More heavy 
metal music," "Better variety of pic- 
tures on the cover," "Print poems 
and stories by kids." Thanks for the 

Some of you would like to see 
more articles on stars, fashion, drink- 
ing and driving, alcohol and drugs. 
You also want to know more about 
yourself, your friends and the world 
around you. Specifically, you want to 
know what teens around the world 
think about Canada, music and 
clothing trends. We'll do our best! 

Diet and exercise top the list of 
great things to learn about in our new 
"Bodyworks" section. Look for your 
suggestions in the next few issues of 

You really liked our cover and 
would like us to stick to the colorful, 
flashy format. You'd also like us to 
move the address stickers to the 
back. Consider it done! 

Overall, you rated the new ZOOT 
as excellent. Thanks for taking the 
time to write. We love to hear from 
you so keep those letters coming! 

ZEKE m(Wi^rp^ 

t's Friday night at The Bottom 
Drawer Teen Club. Zeke and The 
Indoor Plants are playing. The band 
is good. The band is hot. 
The band has problems. 
For starters the lead singer Rosie 
is 13 years old and her curfew is 
10 p.m. This is tough when you have 
to play until midnight. Her older 
brother and the band's leader is 
Zeke. He wants a recording contract 
so badly he can taste it and he tends 
to push people around — like his little 
sister — in order to get it. To make 
matters worse, Zeke fires the new 
roadie Skylite for incompetence. 
What a mess! 
What a play! 

From October through December 
teens around Alberta were treated to 
the play "Zeke and The Indoor 
Plants," by Catalyst Theatre and 
AADAC. It wasn't your usual play 
though. Audience members were 
able to help with solving the band's 
many problems. Every time Rosie or 
Skylite ran into trouble, they turned 
to the audience for help. And they 
needed it! 

Best of all, the final solution in the 
play asks for teens to create a rock 
video of Zeke and The Indoor Plants' 
theme song, "Dance Your Legs Off." 
Audience members were told that 
this will enable the band to audition 
for a recording company without 

actually being there in person. 

ZOOT visited Slave Lake in 
October to watch "Zeke and the 
Indoor Plants." Afterwards, we talked 
to teens who go to school at Roland 
Michener Junior High and several of 
them expressed an interest in help- 
ing to make a video. 

We hope so. Audio and video 
tapes and all the necessary instruc- 
tions for making a video were pro- 
vided. Prizes will be given to those 
who complete a video and they can 
also enter their videos in a province- 
wide contest. The winners will be 
featured on CBC TV's "Monday 
Magazine" and in a future issue of 
ZOOT. Watch for it! 


W I N 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 4 

LOVe 'em 

Issue: Girls on Boys' Teams 

HaTE 'em 


In my opinion, a girl should have the oppor- 
tunity to play "with the guys" if she so desires. I 
don't understand the big problem with the whole 
thing. Certainly with today's accep- 
tance of men involved in women's 
professions and women in 
men's, the controversy of 
girls playing hockey or 
football on guy's 
teams is irrelevant; 
but no, it seems that 
we are still viewed as 
being feminine, and 
therefore fragile. 

I work with a girl who 
plays on a local hockey team 
so I asked her a few questions 
about the attitudes guys have ^ 
toward her. To my surprise, she 
said that most of them were very 
supportive, except for a few who 
found it difficult to adjust to the fact 
that a girl might have the same abil 
ties as them. It's that type of guy which 
makes girls feel they aren't part of the 
team, and this may discourage some 
girls from trying out for male-dominated 
sports. But usually that attitude is held by 
only one or two guys on any given team. In 
fact, you find it in at least one member on 
EVERY team, in EVERY sport. But there's 
always some tension between certain people, not 
just in sports where guys are the dominating sex. 

In closing, I'd like to point out that our provincial 
and federal governments have all kinds of programs 
and committees set up to promote sexual equality in _ 
all aspects of life. Women hold important power posi- • 
tions in government and business. So why not girls in 
male-dominated sports? Why should there be girls-only 
teams and boys-only teams? In this day and age, why are 
we reading about parents across the country making 
formal complaints to human rights commissions because 
their daughters cannot play baseball, hockey or football with 
their sons? % 

These are the 1980s not the 1880s. Women have come ^ 
a long way; but with archaic attitudes about frail and delicate ^ 
women, no one will get anywhere. 

Leigh Ann Turner, age 16, lives in Fort McMurray 
where she plays volleyball, works at a local movie 
theatre and does some newspaper writing. She is a 
peer support group member and will listen to 1 'anything 
but heavy metal" music. 


Girls shouldn't be allowed to play on guys' teams for a 
number of reasons Don't get me wrong. I think girls are quite 
good at their own sports, but what chance would one girl 
stand against the huge guys you find on today's sports 
teams 7 The fact is. they wouldn't stand a chance 1 Sure, 
some girls are fast, and some are strong too. but on 
average, girls aren't athletic in the same way guys are 
Here are some examples to show you what I 
mean Let's say that a fast and strong girl made the 
high school football team She probably wouldn't 
last very long on the field because she isn't as 
rough as the guys, and would most likely get 
hurt if she got tackled by a humongous defen- 
sive lineman A girl, in most cases, is not as 
physically strong as a guy and would hold 
the team back because she couldn't take 
as much abuse. What I just said doesn't 
apply to every girl; I happen to know 
some that would do very well on a 
football team, if given the chance. 
However, it is a proven fact that 
most females are slower and 
weaker than males. 

Another reason I feel that 
girls shouldn't be allowed to 
play on guys' teams is this: 
how many guys do you 
know who want to hit a 
girl? When we were 
small our parents 

V taught us, "NEVER 
hit a girl," and our 
■L friends called us 
fefe. bullies if we did. 
mSk. Now. knowing 
how would 
you feel if you 
had to tackle the 
^^^quarterback on the other 
HP team if you knew he was a 
she? There are other small prob- 
lems: designing and making new 
pp^ equipment to fit the female "physique" 
and building separate change rooms to 
accommodate the two sexes. 
Having said all this, please don't get me wrong 
and make the assumption that I'm a typical "male chau- 
vinist pig." I'm not. It's only that I wouldn't feel comfortable 
if I had to tackle or check a girl. 

Darren Windsor is a sports fanatic who 
spends the other "300 percent" of his life listen- 
ing to music. He's 16 and a student at Lord 
Beaverbrook Senior High School in Calgary. 

What do you think? Drop us a line and give us your opinion. 






ZOOT, JANUARY 1987: 5 

A 9 L- B • E • R • T • K 

TMl ust 

tfi^J UMP 

"Everyone thinks of that film clip from the 
beginning of Wide World of Sports, and tells 
me: You're crazy to do that,' but actually ski 
jumping is very safe." 

That's what Colin Capel, a 17-year-old 
Banff resident, has to say about his hobby, 
ski jumping. Colin is good enough at what 
he does to have toured Europe with the 
National Junior Team. 

"I started alpine skiing at age 3, then as 
I got older, I started using the bumps on hills 
as jumps." While he tried his first real ski jump 
at 10, he's only been training seriously for 
over a year. He's now aiming to compete in 
the 1992 Winter Olympics. He has a coach 
in Banff, where he trains with the Banff Ski 
Runners Team. In the summer he can jump 
onto plastic mats which simulate snow, as 
well as train by sprinting and hopping. 

What does it take to become a ski 
jumper? "You have to be quick," he told 
ZOOT, "and you start low on the hill and work 
your way up - eventually it just comes." 
— Mark Gardiner 

(If you're interested in finding out more about 
ski jumping, in Calgary contact the Altius 
Nordic Ski Club, P.O. Box 8361, Station F, 
Calgary, Alberta T2J 2V5. In Edmonton 
Mr. C. Klagg, 7310 - 114 Street, Edmonton, 
Alberta T6G 1M4.) 

"Fencing," says Shelley Wetterberg, "has 
been described as playing chess while run- 
ning a 50-metre dash!" 

Shelley, a 15-year-old from Calgary, 
fences almost daily with the Epic Junior 
Fencing Club, and runs and cycles to stay 
in shape. It's a training program that paid off 
by making her the top fencer in Western 
Canada in the under-20 age group. She re- 
cently competed at the Junior Pan-Am 

Games in Mexico and 
placed 12th overall. Not 
bad for the youngest person 
in her category! Her goal is to compete in 
the 1992 Olympics. 

Shelley says there's never any doubt 
about who strikes who in fencing; each 
sword, orfoil, is electrically wired, as iseach 
fencer's suit. When an opponent's 
foil touches your suit, 
an alarm goes off 
and lights flash. 

"You need to be 
quick on your feet," 
Shelley explains, 
"and be able to 
think and react 
quickly. It's a men- 
tal game. For ex- 
ample, if someone 
is being aggres- 
sive to me, I'll be 
aggressive right 
back, but if they lay 
back and wait, I'm 
careful, because I 
know that they're 
expecting some- 

En Garde! 
— Mark Gardiner 

(For more informa- 
tion on fencing, 
contact Janet Wet- 
terberg in Calgary 
at 281-0043; she's the Junior Development 
Coordinator of Alberta Fencing Association. 
In Edmonton call the Alberta Fencing 
Association office at 422-0529) 

"Patience, concentration and imagination 

— those are what you need to be an artist." 
These are words to the wise from Doug 

Mercredi, a 16-year-old student at the Blue 
Quills Native Education Council in St. Paul. 
Doug learned about this unique school from 
the Indian Affairs office in his hometown of 
FortChipewyan. "The counsellor wanted me 
to experience new things I couldn't normal- 
ly do up north," says Doug. 

His favorite subjects are the animals and 
Indians from stories told to him by family and 
friends. Doug spends a great deal of his 
spare time working on ideas for new pieces. 
His favorite materials are pen and ink, char- 
coal and acrylic paint. Next year, he hopes 
to get into sculpting. 

Doug currently has work on display at the 
Edmonton Indian Arts and Crafts Museum, 
and a few years ago he had a poster on 
display at the National Art Gallery in Ottawa. 

He is also an avid sportsman. He cross- 
country skis, hunts, traps and camps at 
every opportunity. Another favorite pastime 
is flying. He hopes his artwork will sell 
enough to pay for his education to be a 
helicopter pilot. "I could easily spend my 
whole life flying and painting," he says. 

Doug's advice to up-and-coming artists 
is, "Take your time. Don't get mad if you don't 
do things right the first time. It'll come. All 
you can do is try and try again." 

— Arly Campbell n 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 6 



v 1 fftf} 


You may or may not be in love, or even thinking about love, but 
we think this quiz from Teen Magazine has some tips to help with 
all your relationshii 

IYou believe that being in love 

a) you always will be, until the 
end of time - no matter what. 

,6) never having to apologize for 
your actions. 

c) being sensitive and caring of the 
other person's feelings. 

2 When you're not with your 
h boyfriend/girlfriend, you feel: 

a) depressed and listless; life isn't 
worth living without him/her. 
I b) anxious; maybe he or she's with 
someone else.l ^ 

c) excited about seeing him/her 
again soon. 


3 If you were to see your boy- 
friend/girlfriend talking to 
another girl/boy at school, 
you'd feel: 

a) furious! How could he/she go 
and cheat on you like that! 

b) jealous and somewhat inferior; 
the girl/boy probably has a lot more 
going for her/him than you do. 

c) fine — you're glad your boy- 
friend/girlfriend still keeps in contact 
with other people. 

4 Your relationship with your 
boyfriend/girlfriend could be 
best described as: 


egs noA jeuM ejepejdde se neM 
se 's)seje)u; lenpiAjpu; pue lenjnuj 
buiAeq jo eoueijodwi eg) ezueej 
nc^ Buueqs pue 6uia(6 jo junowe 

■ue LjjiM djusuojjeiaj e s\ sjnox 
s.O Ausoi^ 

a) a roller coaster; you're always 
fighting and then making up. 

b) rocky at times; you're never cer- 
tain if he/she really loves you. 

c) smooth sailing; you argue 
sometimes, but afterward your rela- 
tionship only grows stronger. 

5 Who makes the decisions in 
your relationship? 

l a) your boyfriend/girlfriend. ^ 

b) you. 

c) both of you. 

6 You believe that jealousy: 
a) is a sign of great love. 

b) means you care enough to 
feel threatened at times. 

c) comes from feelings of insecuri- 
ty; it means a lack of trust. 

7 Your actions around people 
other than your boyfriend/ 
girlfriend (such as your 
family and teachers) could best be 
described as: 

#5) nonexistent; you've ignored all 
your responsibilities to be around 

b) not up to your usual standards; 
you're very often preoccupied think- 
ing about him/her. 

c) better than ever; you want to be 
the best person you can be - no mat- 
ter whom you're with. 

eji| jnoA jo seeje luejjodiui 'jegjo 
qi|M ejejjeju; o\ diusuoijeiej eu.) 
6uiM0||e ej.noA pue 'noA joj s6u;ieej 
jeq/sm jnoqe ejnoesui jeqMewos 
ej.noA ujnjej ui |eep jeej6 e eAjeoej 
o\ tuees j.uop noA pue 'djusuoij 
-e|ej eu.i jo pue 6u|ai6 egi uo ej.noA 

8,8 Ausow 

8 The more you get to know 
your boyfriend/girlfriend: 

a) the more faults you see in 
him/her that drive you crazy^^^ 

b) the more you want to change 

c) the more you understand and 
like about him/her. despite his or her 
human flaws. 

9 If you were to mention that 
something he did bothered 
or upset you, he or she'd: 

a) react defensively, or accuse you 
of doing the same thing. 

b) talk you out of feeling as you do. 

c) listen carefully, and ask what 
he/she could do to avoid it in the 
future. ^ 

10 You ' recraz y aDoutmm/ner 

IU - no ifs, ands or buts. His/ 
her feelings for you could 
best be described as: 

a) cool as a cucumber; he/she 
could take it or leave it. 

b) occasionally warm, but only 
when it suits him/her. 

c) reciprocated - 100% 

jnoA jo esogj se hom se 'suojjeped 
-xe jnoA je >joo| esop e e>jei pue >peq 
puejs oj eepj poo6 e eq p|no/w \\ *eq o\ 
\\ e>j!i p.noA se 6uipjeM9J se eq jou 
Aeiu djusuoijeiej sju.) eou;s uojienjej 
-ui pue eAO| ueeMjeq 6umsm6u!is!p 
awn pjeq e eAeu, noA jeqj eiqissod 

s,v Ausow 
:eja/v\ sj9MSuy Jnox j| 

^AJs a teen you've probably heard a 
number of myths about alcohol and 
other drugs. Often these myths are 
like beliefs and assumptions that are 
passed on and accepted without 
question. One of these myths is that 
alcohol brings out the "real you," that 
suddenly after a couple of drinks your 
real self — hidden deep inside — 
comes blossoming forth to impress 
everyone with an abundance of wit 
and charm. 

As with most myths, this is neither 
100 percent accurate or inaccurate. 
There are some physiological 
changes in the brain which tend to 
reduce inhibitions, making a person 
feel more relaxed and sociable. 
Whether this is the "real" person 
coming out or not is subject to 

Who is the real you? A hard ques- 
tion to answer — now that you've 
reached the teenage years. Thinking 
about yourself is a complex issue and 
things aren't as black and white as you 
may often wish. It is now possible to 
think of your identity, who you really 
are, and the image you present to the 
world. It's a time of coming to under- 
stand and feel comfortable with 
expressing who you are as a person. 

It may be important to you to be a 
genuine, authentic, unique person 
expressing yourself with as much 
honesty and integrity as you can. You 
may feel quite different, more know- 
ledgeable and mature than you were 
even last year. And you want the world 
to know it. You want to express the new 
you. But it's not always that easy; we 
all have to face those old fears, uncer- 
tainties and insecurities that get in the 
way. What if expressing your new self 
doesn't turn out to be such a positive 

That's why some people might opt 
for alcohol to bury those feelings and 
give themselves a little artificial 
courage to try again. Maybe your real 
self is a happy, competent free spirit, 
and you want to be able to express 

But expressing the qualities you 
want involves building and develop- 
ing your inner resources. It's actually 
a bit of a paradox. Discovering your 
"real" self is not a matter of finding 
anything; it's a matter of creating an 
identity through the experiences you 
have. You become a strong person by 
being involved in experiences that test 
your strength. You become a confi- 
dent person by being involved in 

experiences that challenge you to put 
aside your insecurities and be 

Alcohol can repress some of the 
fears and make things a little easier 
for a time, but where's the mastery in 
that? It may be a myth, but it's not a 
mystery. Alcohol doesn't bring out the 
real you — that's something only you 
can do. u 

Xf U 


TO THE MArt STANPil^ Oti TH£. 


ZOOT, JANUARY 1987: 8 

Cartoon: Lome Craig 

n 0\A/ \ et 5 C 

'run Adhere 

Hey. V ou Z A <n B>o\oQV 
Not bears Appeared .n 

ftnW wo con 



n may 

not be 

Five V ears 


o1 universe ,or l0 the guys 



*hat happen 


by Steve Olson 

In the early eighties four women came 
together to form The Bangles. Shortly 
after they got together they released an 
E.P. (short for Extended Play - an album 
that only contains a couple of songs). This 
was enough to get them a full record con 
tract, and send them on their way to fama 
Their first full album, "All Over The Place' 
picked up some attention for the group, 
but it was their second album, "Different 
Light" and their single, "Manic Monday' 
that firmly established this group as a sue 
cess. They have been doing a variety of 
tours over the past few months in sup 
port of the album, and it was on just such 
a tour that we tracked them down. We 
talked on the phone with Debbi Peterson, 
the drummer for the group, just before their 
show in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. ZOOT 
files this report: 

ZOOT: How did the band's name come 

DEBBI: Well, we used to be called the 
Bangs, but there was this band in New 

Jersey that was using the same name 
and were sending us nasty letters 
saying 'You've got to change your 
name otherwise you're going to have 
to buy it out or something.' At the time 
we had no money, so we said 'fine, you 
can keep the name, we'll change it.' So we 
kept the B A N G which was the root word 
anyway, and just added the L-E-S. 

ZOOT: You play drums. 
DEBBI: Right! 

ZOOT: How long have you been doing that? 

DEBBI: About 10 years now. 

ZOOT: We don't see a lot of woman drum- 
mers. What made you get interested 
in that? 

DEBBI: Well as far as drums go, it's 
something I really didn't think I could do. 
I didn't know I had it in ma My sister, Vicki, 
had a band going with her friends, and 
when they needed a drummer I was nomi- 
nated. I didn't know I could do it, but I 
sat down and started playing, and I guess 
I had it in me all the time. As far as the 
woman drummer thing, I never thought of 
it as 'Oh isn't it strange I'm a woman and 
I'm playing the drums.' It just never occurred 
to me. I just did it because I love music. 

ZOOT: In the band, there is yourself and 
your sister Vicki, also Susanna Hoffs and 
Michael Steele. How did you all come 

DEBBI: Well, Vicki and I had been playing 
in a band for a while, and we found Susan- 
na through an ad in the paper. And we got 
together in her garage and jammed for a 
while. We had a great time and decided 
this is what we wanted to do. We had 
another bass player that was on the E.P. 
we had out in '82, but that didn't work 
out, so then we found Michael Steele, and 
she's been with the band ever since. 

ZOOT: How do your Mom and Dad feel 

about their daughters being in a rock and 
roll band? 

DEBBI: Well first they said 'Oh maybe you 
should go to college and have something 
to fall back on, or maybe you should be 
a nurse.' We just kept doing what we do, 
and they started to like it, and now they 
are staunch supporters. They think it's 
great and they are quite proud of us. 

ZOOT: What about friends, have they 
accepted it? 

DEBBI: For Vicki and I, I can speak for 
us, we had friends that were strictly into 
it. But some of them thought it was a pass- 
ing fancy. I have a best friend and she was 
just behind me the whole way. Which is 
great. It is so nice to know you have that 
kind of support. 

ZOOT: You have already had a couple of 
hits from the album "Different Light" in- 
cluding the song "Manic Monday," which 
was one of only a couple of songs that 
wasn't written by the band. 

DEBBI: You're right, it wasn't. A friend 
of ours, Prince, sent us a couple of songs 
and we heard them, and said 'Hey, let's 
do this one.' He even suggested we use 
his backing tracks, and we thought 'Nan, 
let's Bangle-file it, make it really Bangle- 
ish and we'll do it ourselves.' We did it and 
it was fun. 

ZOOT: Do you have any advice for poten- 
tial young musicians? 

DEBBI: I'd say if you really want to do 
it, set a goal, then do it, and don't let any- 
thing stand in your way. We have had a 
few obstacles but we've just had to say 
'Hey, this is what we want to do.' You've 
just got to make up your mind and do it. 
Stick with it, and you'll make it. 

ZOOT: Thank you for taking time out of 
your schedule to talk with us. 

DEBBI: Thank you. It was fun. ri 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 10 


his was it. He was now 
face-to-face with those 
TV advertising images of 
hard, sweaty bodies, aero- 
bics classes and weight 
training. It wasn't quite as 
slick, or quite as "too good 
to be true" as the ads made 
out, but there was no doubt 
about it. he still felt a little 
freaked out by the whole 

He was good-looking 
and maybe 19 or 20. He had 
arrived at the fitness club 
with a guy, who seemed to 
be a good friend, and a girl 
who could have been a girl- 
friend. My guess was that 
she was the promoter of this 
adventure. I could imagine 
them sitting around one 

evening, perhaps talking 
about skiing and the need 
to get in shape. Up pops the 
idea: "Why don't we sign up 
for some aerobics classes?", 
and out crawls the response 
"Well, uhh, gee, hmmm, I 
don't know . . . well I guess 
we could try it." 

The moment of truth was 
fast approaching. It was into 
the locker rooms to change, 
and then out in time to 
check out part of the class 
ahead of the one they 
would tackle. By now this 
newcomer was looking dis- 
tinctly nervous. Noticing his 
discomfort had me thinking 
about all the times I've had 
that same uneasy feeling. 
Taking on something new is 

always a little hard on your 
sense of confidence. 

Unknowingly, our new- 
comer was already psych- 
ing himself out. The class 
before his was an advanced 
class, and the idea of trying 
to keep up with what he was 
now watching was more 
than a little scary. He was 
discovering that this kind of 
aerobics meant a series of 
fast-moving steps, kicks 
and movements led by the 
instructor and followed by 
the class. This was looking 
like a high-speed dance 
class and the group he was 
watching had it down pat. 
People moved together. 
Forward. Backward. Side- 
ways. Always working hard. 
Always coordinated. Could 
he do that? Our friend was 
sweating, and his class 

didn't even start for another 
20 minutes. 

Well. 20 minutes is long 
enough to discover a couple 
of other things. The first is 
that there are women in this 
world who are flat-out 
physically tougher than you 
are. The last part of the ad- 
vanced class involved 
push-ups and similar exer- 
cises and there were 
women out there who were 
clearly six times better at it 
than he had ever been. This 
too is not good for the 

About then the instructor 
for his class arrived, and the 
smiles and looks that flashed 
between our newcomer 
and his buddy made their 
assessment of her more 
than obvious; she was gor- 
geoL^! This brought him to 

his last big discovery before 
actually taking the plunge. 
Whether it's foolish pride or 
some other poorly under- 
stood part of being young 
and male, if you're going to 
risk making a fool of your- 
self, you really don't want to 
do it in front of a terrific- 
looking young woman. 

Fortunately, our friend 
had not chosen the ad- 
vanced class for his first 
shot at aerobics. Unfortu- 
nately, he had not chosen 
the beginners' class either. 
Worse yet, he was taking 
himself far too seriously. 
Twenty minutes into it, he 
was feeling like the star at- 
traction in a comedy rou- 
tine. Fumbling around. 
Always out of step. Moving 
left when everyone else 
was going right. 

Unable to see the humor 
in his situation, he left. 
Something new that could 
have been fun had dis- 
solved into a disaster. In 
fact, he had done as well as 
thousands of beginners 
before him. There wasn't 
one person in that advanced 
class who couldn't have 
laughed and recalled 
stories of their own clumsy 

In a way, I should have 
thanked this guy for re- 
minding me of something I 
had stumbled on a couple 
of years earlier as I con- 
fronted some of my own 
little adventures. I call it the 
job of watching somebody 
useless. Somebody bad at 
whatever new thing you 
want to try. Somebody who 
is a rank beginner. Just like 

so many people starting out 
in skiing, skateboarding, 
running a computer, playing 
the guitar, dancing, even 
doing a job, our would-be 
aerobics pro had watched 
the people who were 
already really good. This is 
important because it gets 
you excited about what you 
hope to learn, but your job 
when you first start out is to 
be a good beginner. That's 
all you have to do — be a 
good beginner. 

You get a handle on what 
being a beginner is like, by 
watching the beginners. 
You need to shift your eyes 
away from the pros and 
watch what it's like starting 

Watch somebody useless 
It reminds you that you 
get good at something by 

starting out small JRvby 
having the fun of doing it — 
feeling good about little 
successes, and getting a 
good laugh out of the fact 
that you're only human. 
Yes, we all mess up from 
time to time, and it is tough 
to keep our self-doubt and 
fear of embarrassment in 
check, but there are just a 
lot of good times wrapped 
up in trying new things. And 
knowing you only have to 
be a beginner makes the 
whole thing that much 
easier. h 

Illustration: Lome Craig 

A Secret to Gettin 

Look who's 

This business of communicating with other people 
is a complex one. And the truth is that there's 
a lot more to getting your ideas across than meets the 
ear. The message you deliver is made up of the words 
you use and a bunch besides, including: 

The way you dress 
Where you go to school 
Who your friends are 
Where you live 

Whether you're fat or skinny or in between 
Whether you're rich or poor or in between 
Whether you're real bright or a little slow 
or in between 

The list goes on and on. 

Before you ever open your mouth, the people 
you're about to talk with will have formed some im- 
pression of what they're about to hear. 

The point we want to make is that it's a big mistake 
to think that your audience of one or more is going 
to ignore all the other things to be influenced only by 

the sounds that come out of your mouth. 

The very same sentence uttered by someone who 
excels at shop and tends toward the serious side of 
things may seem something very different said by a 
lanky football star with a great sense of humour. 

This article is going to put forward a couple of tips 
on how to make the "talk" part of your Communica- 
tions Tool Inventor;' more effective. But first, it's 
important to realize that total communication is not 
just a lot of talk. 

So now you know. 

When it comes to effective communication, 
being a good listener is at least as 
important as being a good talker. 

1. It's your turn to talk 

Silence surrounds you. Eager ears wait for the first 
words of wisdom to fall from your lips. You know 
exactly what you want to say. And thirty seconds after 
you've said it, you realize that your point has been 
missed entirely. 

by David Jacox 

What went wrong? 

Here's a theory, for what it's worth: 

You are focused on your words. You put your 
thoughts together in your mind and pick the phrases 
that you're convinced will convey them accurately to 
your listeners. What you don't see is the rest of the 
communications package; you can't picture the com- 
plete context of your words. .As you talk, you make 
gestures. You chuckle, you roll your eyes, you tug at 
your collar .... 

.And the Hawaiian print you're wearing. God: It's 
a conversation in itself. Your message is being mutilated 
by the way you look, the way you move and a million 
other things. The audio portion of your presen- 
tation is out of sync with the video. If only you 
could get the words and pictures working together, 
you could get your thoughts across a whole lot better. 

Good news: 

These days, "seeing yourself as others see you" 
is easy. All you have to do is rent or borrow a video 
camera. Your school can probably help out, in fact. 
Then get together with a friend or a group of friends 
and take turns talking and taping the whole, ugly mess. 

You will be amazed. 

It can be just incredible to see how your manner- 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 14 

. 1 contact, or too much eye contact 
and yTuiows and other conversational characteristics 
can get in the way of what you want to say. 

You can use this technique to get yourself in sync 
and at the same time, have a lot of fun with the people 
you like to talk with in the first place. 

2. Let someone else do the talking 

Now that you know exactly how to say what you 
want to say in a way that leaves no doubt about where 
you're coining from, it's time to help someone else 
achieve the same result. 

This you can do by being a good listener. 

A lot of people think that being a good listener 
amounts to sitting vegged out in a cocoon of silence. 
Not so. Good listeners are not passive listeners. They 
take an active part in the other person's part of the 

How do they do this? Stop being so impatient . Just 

Good listeners use a technique called "paraphras- 
ing." Paraphrasing is very simple, actually. (Easier to 
do than say. ) All it amounts to is periodically checking 
to confirm the accuracy of what you think you're hear- 
ing. Absorb a portion of the message, put it into your 
own words, and run it back by the person who has the 
floor. This will reveal minor misunderstandings before 
they become major misunderstandings. Paraphrasing 
also allows you to take an active part in the conversa- 
tion without dominating it. 

One thing: 

The word is "paraphrasing" not "parrotphrasing." 
Simply repeating everything the other person says isn't 
likely to do much to help communications at all. You 
have to put what you're hearing into your own words; 
words that reflect your personal understanding of 
what's being said. 

"What you're saving, then, is . . .." 

"If I'm hearing you right 

"1 get it! Your point is that 

A final point: 

Part of what makes a conversation exciting and 
worthwhile is, to a degree, the potential for arguments 
and disagreements and the stimulation of different 
points of view. 

It follows that we don't want you to get the idea 
from this article that you should strive for some letter 
perfect, totally predictable and routine kind of dialogue. 
It's just that if you're going to argue, you might as well 
know what you're arguing about. 


We're glad we had this little talk. U 


We asked some Alberta 
teens what their pet peeves 
were. They told us the 

• "Adults stereotyping 
teenagers as being rotten 
and then not allowing us to 
prove them wrong." 

— Steve Aldred, 15, 

• "My sister." 

— Sharon Andruchow, 
14, Edmonton 

• "Snobs and stuck-up 

— Danny Di Luigi, 14, 
Sherwood Park 

— Sharon Colliper, 


• "Being woken up early on 

— Shushma Patel, 16, 

• "Winter." 

— Kelly Coward, 13, 
Peace River 

• "My little brother who 
'borrows' my tapes and 
doesn't return them." 

— Chris Burns, 15, 

• "Going to school." 

— Denise Villeneuve, 
14, Edmonton 


— Kala McDaniel, 


ZOOT wants to know what 
you think about the 

Prized Possessions 
What is your most prized 

Write to "You Said It!" 
c/o ZOOT, The Magazine 
2410, 144 - 4th 
Avenue SW. 
Calgary, Alberta 
T2P 3N4 

and get your answer in 
Alberta's teen magazine, 
your magazine. 

ZOOT, JANUARY 1987: 15 

Snow Sneakers 

by Andrea Orton-Demers 

For all you die-hard sneaker wearers who 
shun mukluks and heavy winter boots, here's 
a helpful hint on how to keep your tootsies 
warm in winter. 

Try layering several pairs of socks. The 
idea isn't a new one, but it's a good one. 

The idea is to create pockets of warm air 
between the layers of fabric. This helps to 
keep your feet dry and warm, and will allow 
you wear to your sneakers year round. 

A word of warning, however: this techni- 
que won't necessarily work in 12-foot snow 
drifts or torrential downpours! 

Are You Being Shafted: 
The Truth About Shampoo 

by Wendy Walsh 

What does the high-priced shampoo give 
you that the unbranded kind doesn't? 

Peace of mind, perhaps, that your locks 
have been treated to the best ... but not 
much more, according to the experts. 

The main ingredient in all shampoos is 
water (as much as 92 per cent), and deter- 
gent, the cleansing ingredient. In a test by 

Consumer Reports Magazine, one un- 
marked "shampoo" was actually a mild dish- 
washing detergent, and at three cents per 
application, compared to 43 cents per appli- 
cation for one designer brand, the panelists 
like it neither more or less than the other 
shampoos they tested. 

Shampoos also contain fragrance, color, 
thickening and foaming agents, all of which 
have no effect on hair but do contribute to 
the product's emotional appeal. Some mild 
shampoos designed for dry hair also con- 
tain oils that coat the hair shaft and make 
it lay flat. These appear in shampoos of all 

Shampoo's purpose is to remove dirt and 
excess oil and just about every shampoo can 
do that, no matter the price. Hair is dead in 
any case. It is formed by cells deep in the 
skin, in a pattern largely determined by 
genes. The only way to nourish your hair is 
through your mouth — a balanced diet — 
not through external products. 

Despite this, you probably favor one 
brand and swear it makes your hair look and 
feel better than any other. And you're pro- 
bably right. Although price isn't a factor, 
shampoos do vary in ingredients, and the 
shampoo that wins your approval may not 
necessarily be a hit with your best friend. 

Reprinted from Verve, June 1986 

Best Junk 

by Andrea Orton-Demers 

You've got the munchies so you head for 
the local corner store, but what to eat? 

Well, instead of a chocolate bar and a can 
of pop you could always try some good 
"junk" food. And there are all sorts of snacks 
to choose from that are good for you and pro- 
vide the ENERGY your body needs. 

Here's a snacking guide as set out in 
Premium Foods for Teens, published by 
Alberta Social Services and Community 

Some "super-charged" snack sugges- 
tions are: yogurt and fruit; a muffin and some 
fruit juice; or a mixture of nuts and seeds, 
like trail mix. Cheese and whole-grain 
crackers are great snacks as is popcorn 
(just go easy on the salt and butter). 

So next time you are struck with the 
munchies try a plain granola bar, or peanuts, 
or a piece of fresh fruit instead of foods that 
are full of sugar and fat and are not so kind 
to your teeth or your weight. 

Hot Potato 

by Andrea Orton-Demers 

With all the outdoor winter activities 
Alberta has to offer, keeping your hands 
warm enough to enjoy them isn't always 
easy. Mittens and gloves help but once your 
hands are cold, they stay cold. 

Keeping your hands warm can be as 
simple as a hot potato. Put a baked potato 
in your jacket pocket. It will help to keep your 
hands warm for up to three hours and pro- 
vide a tasty snack for later. 

First cut the potato open and scoop out 
asmall amount, fill with margarine or butter 
and low-fat cheese, or whatever else you like, 
then wrap well in tin foil and bake. 

So the next time you head out for a day 
of snowmobiling, cross-country skiing or just 
walking to school, remember the "hot 
potato" and bring one along for a special 

Ideas won't keep: 
something must be done 
about them. 

- Alfred North Whitehead 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 16 



STARRING: Whoopi Goldberg 
RATING: 7.5 

CIA, FBI, and now — IBM. Look 
what happens when Whoopi 
Goldberg gets mixed up in 
some wild adventures, just 
because she's computer 

▲ All of this movie was great. I really 
liked it all. One of the best parts was 
when her dress got caught in the 
paper shredder. She went into a big 
party looking like Diana Ross and 
came out looking like Tina Turner. 
A It was funny it was good for a few 

A It wasn't very realistic, kind of like 
a fairy tale. I don't think it would be 
easy to break into a computer system 
like that. 

A She held your attention. She was 
the whole movie. 

A I think they could have made it 
more of a mystery. It wasn't predic- 
table all the way through, but parts 
of it were. 


STARRING: Paul Newman, 
Tom Cruise 

The best way to hustle pool is 
with a sharp kid and a rich man 
who knows the color of money. 

▲ It was great when Tom Cruise 
slicked back his hair and was sing- 
ing to the music and playing around 
with the pool cue. 

A It's the same old American-style of 
movie: girls, sex, car chases and stuff 
like that. 

A It was good acting. There wasn't 
much high action so the acting held 
your attention. The storyline was 
good too. We didn't really know what 
was going to happen next. 
A The filming was good when they 
were following all the pool balls and 
the different angles. 
A The ending was dramatic, but I 
would like to know who won the pool 
game. I know it's a set up for a sequel 
but I don't like being left hanging like 

A Some parts of the movie would 
have been better if we'd seen "The 
Hustler" so we could know what 
Newman's character was all about 25 
years ago. Find out how much of a 
pool shark he was. 


ALBUM: True Colors 
RATING: 7.5 

Her last album was better. 
She is a very good, excellent 

Her song "True Colors" was really 
good. It tells you that you don't have 
to pretend with others but just be 

She has a great voice and great 
song ideas. Most of the songs deal 
with real life. 

• The album is great! I'll buy it 


ALBUM: Bridges Over Borders 

• The lyrics were clear and mean- 
ingful. It has a good message and a 
good guitar player. 

Their best song would probably be 
"Walk Across the Water" Overall, I'd 
say that this group wasn't all that 

I don't really care for this album. 

I've heard of this band before, but 
never listened to any of their albums. 
They could have a good future. 


ALBUM: Somewhere In Time 

It's pretty good 

• There is no real meaning or pur- 
pose to this record. 

• Their last album was much better 
You can't even understand the lyncs 
so they mean diddley squat. 

My overall impression of this 
record is that my dog howls at night 
better than their singing 

STARRING: Paul Hogan 

Surviving in the bush of out- 
back Australia is tough enough 
but trying to survive in New 
York City is a different matter 

a / liked the parts best when they 
were in Australia. 

a / liked it when he came to New 
York, went walking around with that 
big knife then scared off the muggers. 
That was great! 

A I'd definitely recommend this to my 
friends and my folks. 
A The part where the crocodile 
came and grabbed the girl was really 
good. Good action but not overdone. 
The part where he strangled the 
snake so casually was good, like no 
big deal. 

A The ending was faked. It was 
funny, but a little fake. 

a Paul Hogan is a good actor, but 
pretty different. He's too old to be 
good looking. 

a It needs more action. There were 
parts that were just a bit dumb. 


ALBUM: Better Than Heaven 
SINGLE: Two of Hearts 

■ It stunk! The words or music were 
not the same as her lips — it was way 
off in spots. 

■ All she did was change her clothes 
about a hundred times. The song had 
absolutely nothing to do with the 

■ That music was good. It's a lot like 

■ A lot of times she was dressed like 
she was straight out oftheWs but the 
song was just like the '70s. Really 

■ / liked old Angus. Hes hilarious. 
The best part is that they don't take 
themselves all that seriously. 

■ / liked those bike riders. They were 
something else. Really classy, if you 
like leather. 

■ The video part was okay, but it 
seemed more for guys than for girls. 


ALBUM: Who Made Who 
SINGLE: You Shook Me 

■ It was funny, it was amusing and 
it kept you interested. 

ALBUM: Express 
SINGLE: Yin Yan, 
The Flower Pot Man 
RATING: 9.5 

■ It was so weird. It was good, but 
really weird. 

■ / liked the colors and how they 
used them in different ways. 

■ You couldn't understand the words 
but the pictures and the singers could 
still keep you interested in what was 
happening. You couldn't always tell 
what was happening next. 

■ It's not predictable at all. It's really 
different. It's also hard to figure out 
if the song and the video went to- 
gether. You couldn't understand all of 
the words. 

& The song had a good beat. 

■ They've got to be British. 

ZOOT, JANUARY 1987: 17 



How many cigarettes do you have to smoke in a day 
before you are considered to be physically addicted 
to nicotine? 


A friend of mine is getting heavily into drugs. When I told 
him I was worried about him, he told me to mind my own 
business. What can I do to help? 

Phys cai dependence ■ an jccur 
but the degree vanes from individual 
to individual The number of cigarettes 
that have to be smoked per day to 
produce physical dependence has yet 
to be clearly defined What is known, however, 
is that psychological dependence on nicotine 
develops among regular smokers of several 
cigarettes per day 



Do beer and wine contain any vitamins and 
minerals that are good for you? 

O Situations like this are often difficult to deal with because drug users 
typically deny they may have a problem. It is important that you do 
not cover up or make excuses for your friend's behavior. He will 
have to face the reality of his own actions sooner or later. Tell your 
fnend you are concerned about his drug use because you really care 
about him. His rejection of your help is not meant personally; it is not 
rejection of you as a friend, but part of the denial of the problem. Also, try to 
provide a good example for him in your own use/non-use of alcohol and other 
drugs Your opinion won't carry much weight if you are also using drugs heavily 
If your friend still continues to use drugs heavily and you are concerned 
because you haven't been able to help, it is time to consider your own needs 
Talk to someone you trust about the situation and your feelings. 

Which is more dangerous, sniffing or smoking cocaine and why? 

Beer and wine have a high calorie content, 
but very little by way of vitamins and 
minerals. Alcohol cannot be relied on 
to provide any of the body's 
nutritional needs. 


Overdose deaths can occur when cocaine is injected, smoked or even snorted 
(sniffing). The dangers of cocaine use vary depending on how the drug is taken, 
the dose and the individual. Smoking is the most direct and rapid way to get 
the drug to the brain. Because larger amounts get to the brain more quickly, 
smoking also increases the risks associated with using the drug. These risks 
include confusion, anxiety, psychological problems and serious physical effects on 
the heart and blood vessels. 

Is it true that a combination of aspirin and alcohol can kill you? 

Our investigations have failed to turn up any research that suggests aspirin 
(acetylsalicylic acid) and alcohol are a fatal combination. What is true, however, 
is that aspirin can cause stomach irritation. Alcohol in combination with aspirin 
dramatically increases the irritation caused by aspirin or alcohol alone. Bleeding 
from the stomach wall can also result. 

What do amphetamines (uppers) do to your body? Can they cause 
severe headaches? 

Amphetamines are a group of central nervous 
system stimulants. Drugs in this category can 
produce short-term effects such as wakefulness, 
reduced hunger and an overall subjective feeling 
of well-being. In addition, other effects include 
restlessness, dizziness, insomnia, mild confusion, 
headaches and an increased and irregular heart rate. 

Straight Goods will give you the straight 
information on anything to do with alcohol and 
drugs. Send your questions to: 

Straight Goods 
c/o ZOOT, The Magazine 
2410, 144 - 4th Avenue S.W. 
Calgary, Alberta 

T2P 3N4 
or phone toll-free 
to 1-800-372-9578 

All names are kept strictly confidential. 
All your questions will be answered by AADAC staff. 



!n November, ^"^L^nnetolZOOrs 
Caloary. vos selected as*nne n 

tW September 86 ssue t0 , h e 

to^RS5i. S:R,,,, ' ,oor 1 

we nearly dropped « e Cen(re do wn- 
^ouredthetamousEaton 0(e 

interesting y uee " „ rt fashions. 

Alter the rew^o^Y ^o, 
to a ballroom ^« ^ to the Irort 
junos beoan, We ^sat cio ^ 
and right beside ^re w . f ^ 

lt^sgreattosee^yo n e> j 
the performances were EO _ som e 

better than others, wo 

pertormances.-.- asavro nder- 
v FoHow>ng the teiecdb ^ ner 

tut dinner ^^dra^eduslnot^ 
bizarre peop^JJfJ °\ assure you) to a 
inn and screaming, » « b Cap »to\ 

Records. Thedn^rotasirei nere 

hotel ft «as 3 a.m. (t , e airport 
Up at 6 a.m. and oui _ heWp 

«»r«wrfer W td. 
Ill Valerie Berenyi 


I'm tired of living. It's not right that I begin my days hating them, 
waiting for something else. I want to end the misery now . . .. 

What follows is a fictionalized account of one girl's deep depression, her thoughts 
of suicide and her eventual realization that life is precious: 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 20 

January 18 

I don't care what you say. University 
has to be less painful than school. I wish 
I was in Toronto. I wish I was in an awful 
dorm. I wish I could talk to you. But I can't. 
I'm in a math class right now, sitting in 
a desk that's gnawing my back. I'm not 
supposed to be writing this. I'm sup- 
posed to be doing something else. This 
is the catch. I could skip the class but I 
still wouldn't be free. Ignoring obligation 
isn't freedom. I want to leave, see what 
you're seeing, new streets, new people. 
I want a different life, yours. 

University, term papers, a big city I've 
never seen: these are symbols to me, 
dreams I wake from every day, crying 
because I've wakened wanting to go 
back. I close my eyes, swim downward, 
but the pressure thuds on my head. The 
vision blurs. I never get to the place I'm 
looking for. I surface, ears full of blood. 

I'm always supposed to be doing 
something else. It's not right that I begin 
my days hating them, waiting for some- 
thing else. Every thing in my life is 
waiting, embryonic, as if the real living 
hasn't started yet. When will I be alive ? 
Am I alive now? The line between living 
and not living is a thin one. It would be 
easy to step over — just a shallow scrap 
in the dust — because I can hardly see it. 

If this is living, how much worse can 
nothing be? A cool darkness, a quiet 
place, just the wind over me. If one is 
dead, one can't be expected to do any- 
thing. Freedom. I've been trying to 
rationalize thisfeeling away, butl'm not 
rational, not logical anymore. My math 
marks prove that. But I should quit whin- 
ing before they cut out my tongue. 

Cutting out tongues. They do that, you 
know, in faraway countries whose 
names no one recalls. I saw it last night 
in a documentary about torture. I 
learned that people will do anything at 
all to each other. Humans are more 
cruel than other animals because they 
mutilate with the power of their intelli- 
gence. They are artistic in their crimes. 

What do you think of this logic: If 
humansare worth lessthananimalsand 
if the difference between living and not 
living is almost non-existent, why am I 
even here? I'm waiting for your letter. 
Chimene, like I'm waiting for everything 
else. But I'm not expecting any answers. 

y//* w February 10 

When my mother asks me what's 
wrong, I say, truthfully, "it's the weather." 
The entire world is gray, the slush gray 
of filthy snow and muted sky. My eyes 
have grown a skin of this color. What 
used to be alive is cold, curled into itself, 
silent. Even my dreams are drained of 
color, shadowed. And mv dreams are 
telling me stories. 

Death is an open, 
swept place, 
a white field. 

Last night I dreamt of my sister again. 
Today the images play themselves over 
and over. She's in her bedroom under the 
covers other bed. I've been waiting for 
her to wake up for hours. Finally I decide 
to wake her myself. I go to the bed, reach 
down, gently push her shoulder with the 
heel of my hand. She doesn't stir so I push 
harder. Under my hand, her shoulder 
sinks in like a sponge. I touch her whole 
body and it's like that, flaccid, full of air. 
In a few seconds, she's an empty skin. 
She turns into a blanket on the bed, dis- 
appears. I woke up this morning with 
one long tear in my bed sheet. 

Just a slice. 
It would only sting, 
a sweet hard sting, 
then a sharp color, 
the quick flowering 
of blood. 

I'm tired. Chimene. Remember what 
I said about living and not living? Just 
a slice. It would only sting, a sweet hard 
sting, then a sharp color, the guick 
flowering of blood, something better 
than gray. All I have to do is cut that line. 
How simple, how easy. Easier than this, 
the slow pain of each day, like a 
machine running down, leading now- 
here. My life consists of empty hours 
listening to droning voices that have 
droned the same thing to hundreds of 
other gray skulls. 

If this is all I get I don't want it. I'm 
wasting misery have been for a long 
time. It's too hard. 


Two years ago, Lynn curled into 
herself, turned cold. You remember. 
What color is dying? I don't think it's 
black: funerals lie. Death is an open, 
swept place, a white field. Lynn lives 

February 25 

I know that by now you have received 
my last letter. You must have realized that 
I was giving up. But that letter changed 
my life and gave me a reason to live. I 
had copied it out on a separate sheet 
before I sent it to you. I planned to leave 
a copy of those words behind for my 
family, in a place where they would be 
found. I thought they were the best words 
to leave, to explain why. 

I rewrote the copy over and over, un- 
til it was bland with repetition, almost like 
a nursery rhyme, a child's song. I wanted 
to be sure and by repeating the words 
I knew I could convince myself of their 
truth. I don't know when I fell asleep, past 
three sometime with my clothes on, 20 
loose sheets of paper on my bed and 
desk. I was still reciting the letter in my 
head, as if counting sheep. 

She was crying 
before I woke up, 
before she shook me, 
pummelled me 

Maybe I didn't do this by accident. An 
article the counsellor gave me said 
"Suicide attempts by all but the most 

ZOOT, JANUARY 1987: 21 

seriously depressed young people in- 
volve the hope that something, some- 
one will save them." At any rate, Mom 
came in at seven the next morning to 
wake me up I hadn't set my alarm, 
hadn't left for school. She read the let- 
ter. She was crying before I woke up. 
before she shook me, pummelled me 
awake. Because, of course, she thought 
I had done something already, an over- 
dose of pills like Lynn. I terrified her. 

That day I stayed at home. She cried 
more than I did. I had forgotten how 
much she's already lost I'd forgotten so 
much. That night, I called the Crisis 
Centre downtown. I called them myself 
— I wouldn't let Mom because I wrote the 
letter. I've gone three times already, just 
to talk and to have someone listen to 
what I say. 

Now I feel as though I've been in 
darkness but have suddenly wakened, 
or received light. Only now do I realize 
that for a long time I've been far from 
solid ground, on the very edge of some- 
thing. It's unnerving, but a very strong, 
alive feeling, too, the way a bird might 
feel before flight. 

I know, Chimene, that it's only 
February, Chinook weather, but who can 
tell when spring really begins? It's noon 
right now. I'm writing in the park across 
from the school. The streets are stream- 
ing with melted snow, the air is bright 
with sun, there's a wind like a warm sheet 
of silk on my face. Things are opening 
again, the colors are coming back. 
Above me, the sky spreads clear, swept 
of clouds. 

At night it's still cool, so I light the 
f ireplace. I burn a copy of the letter every 
night. I don't want to get rid of them all 
at once, but slowly, so I can move back- 
wards through the motions, unwind the 
words, find out where they came from. 
Destroying them is not such a hard thing. 
There are always more words, better 
ones. After all, I'm sending you yet 
another letter. 

Write soon, Chimene. I'll be here. 

Karen Connelly is a 17-year-old 
writer currently on an exchange 
program in Thailand. She was 
featured as a "Hot Kid" in the 
November '86 issue of ZOOT. 

For more on suicide turn to Page 22 



What would you do if one of your 
friends told you they had thought about 
killing themselves. 

Would you think he was joking? 

Would you think he just wanted 
attention 9 

Would you try to forget the whole 
thing 9 

If you did any of theaboveyou might 
miss an opportunity to help a friend. 
Suicide is not a pretty or romantic thing 
and chancesare you wouldfeel shock- 
ed and frightened But what can you do 
to help 9 

'Take him seriously 

If his feelings are deep enough to 
want to talk about committing suicide, 
there is a definite possibility he may be 

"Be supportive 

Your friend feels very alone and very 
scared. He needs you to be calm, car- 
ing and supportive. Tell him that you'll 

Continued from Page 21 

help find a way out of his problems other 
than suicide Gain his trust and find out 
what's happening. Your confidence will 
provide him with a sense of relief He's 
taken the first step to staying alive by talk- 
ing to you. 


Don't lecture, judge or point out all 
the reasons he has to live. They may 
make him feel worse Ask questions: Why 
do you feel so badly? What has hap- 
pened? Are you thinking about killing 
yourself? Do you have a plan? Talk about 
it in a straightforward manner. Calmly 
accept what he has to say. Your accep- 
tance will give him hope. 

•Get Help 

Figure out who you can trust (a 
teacher, counsellor, parent, doctor or 
nearest crisis line) and stay with your 
friend until he gets the care and atten- 
tion he needs If the help you get isn't any 
good, get some that is. 

At the same time, you should talk to 
someone you trust. It's very distressing to 
be involved with a suicidal person and 
you will need to talkaboutyourfeelings. 

Here are some numbers you can call 
for help or for more information on 

'Suicide Information and Education 
Centre, 283-3031 
•Teen Line, 266-1608 


•Camrose Counselling Service, 

Cold Lake 

•Help Line, 594-3353 


•Distress Line, 426-4252 

Fort McMurray 

•Help Line, 743-4357 

Red Deer 

•Crisis Line, 342-4141 

Rural Areas 

Talk to someone (parent, counsellor, 
teacher) whom you feel comfortable 
with and trust, and who can help you or 
a friend. fi 

I came into my room one day 
after school and caught my mother snooping through 
my diary. I told her she had no right to read it. There 
are things I write down that are special to me. and 
I dtm 't want anyone to read them. She says she doesn 't 
know what 's going on in my life, that I never talk 
to her about it, and she worries about me and my 
friends (she doesn't like my friends). Do you think 
it was fair of her to do that? Who is right' 
P.W., Grande Prairie. 

Sometimes your parents' 
concern for your well-being and happiness can 
cause them to do things they wouldn't normally 
do. Your mother may have used poor judgement 
in reading your diary - invading someone's priv- 
acy just makes them close up even more. Consider 
if you haven't been opening up to your mother in j 
the past, or if there are any grounds for her con- 
cern. Sit down and have a talk about what you 
feel is private and what's not. Sometimes gain- 
ing your parents' trust is just a matter of letting 
them know what you think about things - why 
you chose your friends, why you make the deci- 
sions you do. They may not always agree with you, 
but they can contribute their opinions and give 
you support. Perhaps when they have more con- 
fidence in your judgement, they'll worry less. And 
if they aren't worried you're hiding from them, 
hopefully they'll respect your privacy. 


My bestfrie nd and I arc real ly 
close, andean usually talk about anything. But she's 
started seeing this netv guy that I /rally don 't like. No 
one else likes him much either and he doesn 'tseem to 
want usamund her anymore — he wants her all to 
himself. I tried to tell her I don't think he's good for 
her, but she just got mad and wouldn't listen. I don't 
leant to lose her asa friend. Should I say something.' 
C.S'. Leth bridge 

While it always works best in 
a friendship to be honest and upfront, you may 
have said all you can for now. Make sure you've 
really made an effort to get to know her boyfriend. 
And make sure she knows you have good reasons 
for not liking him - such as his alienating her 
friends. We're always hardest on the people we're 
closest to. Your friend may have doubts about him 
herself, and feels that in listening to you, she's ad- 
mitting she made a mistake. Explain to her that 
you're always there if she needs to talk. Give her 
a little time. The best thing you can do is to be 
understanding and patient. Don't force her to 
choose between you and her boyfriend. She's pro- 
bably concerned now with defending him against 
everyone. Maybe if she has some time to really 
get to know him. she'll come around, and see 
you're right. 

My girlfriend and I broke up a 
month ago. I want to befriends but she won't eien 
talk to me. I didn't do anything wrong. I told her why 
I wanted to break up and everything. She avoids me 
totally now. which is hard because we have all the 
same friends. I don't know why she's doing this. 
What should I do? 

G.K.. Edson 

The transition between dat- 
ing and friendship is always difficult. Your ex- 
girlfriend may feel rejected - she's probably still 
sorting out her feelings about you, and about her- 
self. We often take other people's opinions of our- 
selves to heart, and so take a break-up as a total 
rejection: "If he doesn't want to go out with me 
anymore, I must be boring, and unattractive, etc." 
She may not understand why you want to talk to 
her now. when you've said you don't want to go out 
anymore. Give her some time to start feeling bet- 
ter about herself. If you rush her. she may mis- 
understand vour friendship as something more. 


I decided long ago never to walk in 

anyone's shadow 
If I fail, if I succeed at least 

I'll live as I believe 
— Whitney Houston 

(written by Linda Creed, Michael Masser) 

ZOOT. JANUARY 1987: 22 



I really appreciated the 
article What Makes You So 
Great?. It was nice to hear 
something nice about teens 
for once instead of the usual 
put-downs and underestima- 
tions. It's just too bad that 
more adults don't read ZOOT 
so they could see our side of 
things expressed so excel- 

K.T., Coronation 


I enjoyed the Luba inter- 
view in the last issue; it was 
neat to hear what makes a 
good singer "tick." 

Page 18 of the September 
'86 issue of ZOOT was inter- 
esting, I must say. Nice to 
finally see Zits Zantini (sans) 
dark shades for once. Ha! And 
you thought no one would 
notice. I could pick his phony 
smile and baby dimple out of 
a Cabbage Patch Doll lineup. 

I was not impressed by the 
Wrestling Maniac fiasco on 
page 23. What were you try- 
ing to prove, anyway? How 
about demonstrating an aero- 
bics fitness class? It would be 

more beneficial in the long 
run, if ya know what I mean. . . 

C A . Edmonton 

(That was not Zits Zantini on 
page 18. That was Harvey, a 
guy from Calgary) 


Your magazine is totally 
radical! To E.F. from Edmon- 
ton who hates your magazine: 
Are you unconscious or 
something? How many Alber- 
tan magazines do you know of 
that give information on 
drugs, friendships, nutrition, 
music, movies and "Hot Kids" 
in Alberta? And how many go 
to the different schools and 
have interviews with rock 
stars? I think, E.R.that you've 
got a couple of screws loose! 
Keep up the good work, ZOOT. 
Where I live, all the teenagers 
appreciate you. 

T.R., Spirit River 

against, but not laughed at. 
Smoking is completely differ- 
ent from having blue eyes, 
wearing glasses, being white 
or black, or being Catholic or 
Protestant. There's a reason 
for discrimination against 
smoking — it's bad for you. 

If non-smokers treat 
smokers like dirt, it's only 
because they don't want to 
ruin their health just because 
the smokers are. 

A M , Grimshaw 

I would like tocommenton 
the issue of smoking in school 
(September '86). I disagree 
with the "Love 'Em" side. Sure, 
smokers are discriminated 


I've really enjoyed your new 
ZOOT. I can't wait to get next 
month's. I just can't take my 
eyes off it. It is so interesting. 
Have you ever got a complaint 
about anything in your maga- 
zine? If so, it must have been 
a really, really small complaint 
because I don't find one thing 
wrong with new ZOOV. It's 

T.A.. Grand Centre 

Read on . . . 


ZOOT really stinks. Your 
articles are boring and worth- 
less. The only good use of 

your magazine is to supply 
jobs for your pitiful em- 
ployees. I really don't like your 
stupid magazine. Dumb cover, 
cheap paper and useless ar- 
ticles. I was drinking a glass 
of juice while writing this let- 
ter and I kept it on my disgust- 
ing ZOOT magazine instead 
of a napkin (I wouldn't want to 
ruin the napkin). Please print 
this letter. It might be the best 
article in your crummy maga- 
zine. You'll be hearing more 
from me. . _ _ , 

L P. Fort McMurray 


First of all, I would like to 
take this time to say that I real- 
ly enjoy the magazineZOOT. 
I'm really glad that I receive 
these excellent teenage 
magazines. PLEASE KEEP 

I was wondering if you 
could possibly put a little note 
in ZOOT for me. It doesn't 
have to be fancy; just put it in 
a far corner if you wish. I 
would like to say: 
To my sweet sister Susan 
Thanks a million for all 
The help you've given me! 
You're the greatest, teach. . fi 

A K . St Paul 


Dear Readers: 


Want a Pen Pal? 

If so, write to your mag {ZOOT, that is) and we'll put you on our "Pen Pal Exchange." This is a mailing list which includes more than 100 names of people like you - teens in search of Pen Pals. 

Send us your name, full address, age and a description of your hobbies and interests. We'll send you the list of the 100-plus names we've compiled. You write to whomever interests 
you. Sounds simple? It is! 

The ZOOT crew. 

PS. Should your hand get cramped from writing too many letters, let us know and we'll take your name off the list, tooz! 

Yours truly, 



a * HF-iX I have to stop and 
v^J^^ L^-^\^v^ find myself again. ) 

i j~j